Black Sheep (1996)
David Spade: Steve Dodds
Photos
Quotes
-
[Mike is pretending to be a cop, Steve is pretending to be a prisoner]
Steve : Ro-ads. Ro-ods.
Mike : Quiet back there! I've taken enough guff from you for one day!
[turns to state trooper]
Mike : Raving psycho! Butchered 400 chickens and screwed a beagle. I'm taking him back to Nevada where he's wanted for banging horses!
-
Mike : Man! This place is trashed!
Steve : Check this out! This whole fridge is held up here just by this plug!
[unplugs the fridge, letting it slide toward Mike, pinning him against the wall]
Steve : You OK?
Mike : [groaning in pain] I'm just dandy! I got a bowl of chocolate pudding in my underpants!
Steve : ... We didn't have any pudding in there, buddy.
-
Steve : [Steve is going to flip off the old lady, and starts out by acting like he's digging around in his pocket looking for it] Lady, I got something for ya. Kind of a souvenir for you here.
Old lady : [impatiently] Yes?
Steve : [falters, then changes his mind] Never mind; forget it.
Old lady : [Looks at his hand] What'cha doing? Playing Pocket Pool there, son?
Steve : [tries to push past her] Excuse me.
Old lady : Hey, ya got a lil chubby goin' on there!
[stalks off]
Old lady : Dream on, you little fart.
[Steve mouths "Yeah" and covers his face in embarrassment]
-
[the roof has blown off the house and it begins to hail all over Mike who is in the top bunk]
Steve : Hey Mike! 'I got dibs on top bunk!' Ha ha ha ha.
Mike : Shut up!
Steve : Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, I love it.
Mike : Why don't you shut up?
Steve : 'Hellooooo Washington'. Ha ha ha.
Mike : SHUT! UP!
Steve : Hahahahahahahaaaa. Ohhh, no.
[Mike's bed, with the added weight of the hail, collapses from above]
Mike : Oh!
Steve : Aaaooow!
-
Steve : [on Drake Sabitch] This guy is like Leatherface, Chucky and Jan Brady all rolled into one.
-
Steve : [completely wasted on the nitrous oxide] ... But, this map is heavy... It's got all of those... robes on it. Robes? Rogues?
Mike : [also stoned; giggling] Roads!
Mike : [suddenly stops laughing] I'm stoned... so are you!
[looks in the backseat]
Mike : Dammit! The nitrous oxide's leaking into the car! OK, calm down... we just gotta keep under the speed limit... limit...
[starts giggling again]
Mike : Limit! Haha, that's another one of those freaky words!
-
[last lines]
Al Donnelly : [as Mike sees his brother and Steve off in their plane] So long, little brother.
Mike Donnelly : Okay, see you, Al. So this is it, huh, Steve?
Steve Dodds : I guess I'm gonna miss you. I'm not gonna miss a 9mm to my head, but... What were you thinking?
Mike Donnelly : I don't know. All right, you guys. Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
[as they board, Mike closes the door and waves goodbye, but his coat is caught in the door, and the planes starts to drag him]
Mike Donnelly : Oh, my God! No! No! Please don't take off! Please! Al! Al! No, no! NOOOOOOOOOOO! AAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLL!
[the planes takes off, and Mike flies along for the ride]