Topper Returns (1941)
Billie Burke: Mrs. Clara Topper
Photos
Quotes
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Eddie, the Chauffeur : Doors closing by themselves. People talkin' to nuthin' and gettin' answers. I'm going back.
Clara Topper : Back where?
Eddie, the Chauffeur : To Mr. Benny. Ain't nuthin' like this ever happened there.
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Clara Topper : Why, you're all wet. Is it raining out? Oh, but you haven't been out. Can't be raining in. Well, if it has, it's all cleared up.
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Clara Topper : I think its ridiculous for a man of your age to pursue young girls. What will the neighbors think?
Cosmo Topper : I didn't pursue them, Clara. They forced themselves on me.
Clara Topper : Don't be absurd! Imagine girls, pretty girls, forcing themselves on a paunchy, middle-aged man.
Cosmo Topper : Why, I don't think I'm paunchy.
Clara Topper : Don't try to change the subject! At least you might have waved to me when you went by!
Cosmo Topper : I've explained that, darling. I couldn't. That girl was sitting on my lap.
Clara Topper : I know she was! I warn you, Cosmo. If ever you do a thing like this again, I'm going back to Mama.
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Mr. Carrington : I think you'll find him in the sitting room.
Clara Topper : The sitting room.
Topper's Maid : Maybe she's still sitting on his lap?
Clara Topper : Sitting on his lap? Good heavens! You mean you've got a room just for that?
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Clara Topper : Edward, you look for him down that way.
Eddie, the Chauffeur : Its awful dark down there.
Clara Topper : Darkness never hurt anyone.
Eddie, the Chauffeur : It ain't the darkness, Mrs. Topper. Its what's in it!
Clara Topper : Don't be silly. There's no difference light and dark; except, the lights are out.
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Sgt. Roberts : [on the phone] Cosmo Topper. Well, what's he look like?
Clara Topper : Like a banker. Of course, that's because he is a banker.
Sgt. Roberts : Well, can you describe him?
Clara Topper : Well, he wears a size 15 shirt with a 33 sleeve. A 9 and a half sock liner. And he's slightly bald.
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Clara Topper : Trying to make these policemen understand something is harder than doing it yourself.
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Clara Topper : Oh, stop all this fiddle-faddle!
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Clara Topper : Oh! Where's that friend of yours? The one that goes around sitting on people's laps!
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Sgt. Roberts : Where's your husband?
Clara Topper : In the icebox.
Sgt. Roberts : Has he got the body with him?
Clara Topper : Certainly. Under his overcoat.